Virtual Noir at the Bar Wednesday May 6th

vnb

Dennis Tafoya, author of Dope Thief and The Wolves of Fairmont Park, organized a virtual Noir at the Bar with this great crowd of writers: Scott Adlerberg (Jungle Horses), Jen Conley (Seven Ways to Get Rid of Harry), Nik Korpon (The Rebellion’s Last Traitor), Jon McGoran (Spliced), Derek Nikitas (The Long Division), Steve Weddle (Country Hardball), Wallace Stroby (The Crissa Stone series), Dave White (the Jackson Donne series) and myself.

Join us Wednesday May 6th at 7:00PM EST on Crowdcast.

 

Tommy Salami’s Plucking Patreon

Forgive me, Dear Reader. I haven’t updated this blog regularly for a long time. Instead, I wrote the Goombah Gumbo Newsletter and a few articles on Medium, but I have finally settled on a Patreon to collect my writing for those who want to support me this endeavor. There will always be free stories, articles, and posts to read there. But I’m trying something new:

My previously published stories that are not available free online will be available there for patrons of the Foxy Donuts tier and higher, and I will write a Patreon-exclusive story or article each month for those patrons. You can also read regular posts for free, or chip in a buck if you want to buy me a coffee. The story-level tiers also get you a Harshly Worded Letter or a Fart Haiku postcard!

For those inclined, there are also tiers where you get monthly correspondence such as tiny stories and poems, and one where you get a book from my library of forbidden tomes and incunabula, aka pulp paperbacks and such.

Blogging is so 2000s. In fact, I missed the 10th anniversary of this one. I think there’s a place for communication between the flitting of social media and lengthy newsletters, and Patreon has a nice look to it. Please come visit, there are free snacks. As John Fogerty said, you don’t need a penny to hang around. But if you got a nickel, why don’t you lay your money down?

Click the image below to visit Tommy Salami’s Plucking Patreon.

2020-03-10 11_52_46-Window

SEEN, READ 2020

I really liked this idea by Steven Soderbergh, so I’ll be updating this post all year. I used to use GoodReads and NetFlix to keep track, but that’s not complete, and it can disappear at corporate whim. This can too, but less likely.

All caps, bold: MOVIE
bold: concert, show, other event
All caps: TV SERIES
Italics: Book or Comic Book
Quotation marks: “Play” / “Broadway Show” LOL what are those?
Italics, quotation marks: “Short Story” or “Poem”(all this shit stole from Steven Soderbergh)

1/1
SCHITT’S CREEK (S3 1-6)
Mr. Know-it-All: The Tarnished Wisdom of a Filth Elder, by John Waters.
1/2
Criminal #11
1/3
FAT GIRL
1/5
HUSTLERS
1/6
“Ride-Along”, Ron Riekki (Akashic: Mondays are Murder).
1/7
DARE ME 2
1/8
“Playing Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain”, Jamil Jan Kochai (The New Yorker).
1/9
“The Porcupine Method”, J. Danielle Dorn (Tough Crime).
THE MANDALORIAN (6 7 8)
1/10
HARRY AND THE HENDERSONS
MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE
1/12
READY OR NOT
1/13
DARE ME 3.
THE IN-LAWS (1979)
1/15
Sing, Unburied, Sing, by Jesmyn Ward.
1/16
“Found Wanting,” Douglas Stuart (The New Yorker)
“I Sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter,” Isabel Fall (Clarkesworld)
SEIS MANOS S1 1-2
1/18
THE ULTIMATE WARRIOR (1975)
SCHITT’S CREEK S3 6-13, S4 1-2.
1/20
SCHITT’S CREEK S4 2-7.
1/21
“Visitor,” by Bryan Washington (The New Yorker)
TWIN PEAKS S1 PILOT.
1/22
“God,” by Ben Loory (BOMB Magazine)
TWIN PEAKS S1 2-3
1/23
“A Girlfriend’s Guide to Gods,” by Maria Dahvana Headley (TOR)
NO BLADE OF GRASS
1/26
SEIS MANOS (S1 3-8)
1/27
The Writing Life, by Annie Dillard.
1/28
LITTLE WOMEN (2019)
1/29
GEORGE CARLIN: IT’S BAD FOR YA
1/30
“Sussex, Essex, Wessex, Northumbria,” by Brandon Taylor (Oprah Magazine)
ONCE UPON A TIME… IN HOLLYWOOD
2/1
FORD V FERRARI. DARE ME 4.
2/2
THE MALTESE FALCON (1941)
1917

Criminal #12
2/3
The Way We Die Now, by Charles Willeford
2/4
“King of the Blue Rose,” by William R. Soldan (Tough Crime)
“Killer Roll,” by Naomi Hirahara (Discover Nikkei)
Goliath, by Tom Gauld
JOKER
2/5
“Things We Worried About When I Was Ten,” by David Rabe (New Yorker)
Islands Linked by Ocean, by Lisa Linn Kanae
SCHITT’S CREEK S4 3-10
2/6
THE JUNIPER TREE
I WALK ALONE (1947)

2/7
“Turistas,” by Hector Acosta (¡Pa’Que Tu Lo Sepas!)
“The Bones of Rio Rico,” by David Bowles (¡Pa’Que Tu Lo Sepas!)
2/8
Goliath, by Tom Gauld
2/9
HAIR LOVE
HARRIET
2/10
“Deportees,” by James Lee Burke (The Strand)
“Carnival,” by Laura Benedict (The Strand)
2/11
SCHITT’S CREEK S4 11-13, S5 1-2
2/12
THE LAST BLACK MAN IN SAN FRANCISCO
DARE ME 6
2/13
“The Lost Performance of the High Priestess of the Temple of Horror,” by Carmen Maria Machado (Granta)
2/14
BLINDED BY THE LIGHT
2/15
“Girls Without Their Faces On,” by Laird Barron
“Thin Cold Hands,” by Gemma Files
“Shit Happens,” by Michael Marshall Smith (The Best Horror of the Year Volume Eleven)
2/16
City of Margins, by William Boyle
I Kind of forgot for a few weeks so here’s a summation…
2/20
BAXTER
2/21
MEL BROOKS: UNWRAPPED
DARE ME 7
TWIN PEAKS S1 4 5
2/24
Briarpatch, by Ross Thomas
BETTER CALL SAUL S5 1 2
BRIARPATCH 1 2
THE NIGHTINGALE (did not finish)
DEATH OF A SALESMAN (did not finish)
“Sand People,” by Maria Lioutaia (One Story)
“Lethe,” by Leanna James Blackwell (True Story)
2/29
YELLA
3/2
CABARET (1972)
3/3
Agency, by William Gibson
BETTER CALL SAUL S5 3
DARE ME 8
BETTER THINGS S4 1 2 3
3/4
“With the Beatles,” by Haruki Murakami. (The New Yorker
3/6
PORTRAIT OF A LADY ON FIRE
And I Do Not Forgive You, by Amber Sparks
3/7
THE COLOUR OUT OF SPACE
3/8
The Lost Bayou Ramblers and Poguetry at Rough Trade NYC
3/9
“Allocthon,” by Livia Llewellyn (The Best of the Best of the Horror of the Year, ed. Ellen Datlow)
DARE ME 9 10
3/10
“Paper Menagerie,” by Ken Liu (Gizmodo/Magazine of Fantasy & SF)
3/12
Jack Waters, by Scott Adlerberg
3/13
You Will Not Be Forgotten,” by Mary South (The New Yorker)
JOHN WICK 3: PARABELLUM
3/14
BETTER CALL SAUL S5 E4
BETTER THINGS S4 4
3/15
SCHITT’S CREEK S5 8-12
Dreyer’s English, by Benjamin Dreyer.
3/16
SCHITT’S CREEK S6 1-4
3/17
VIDEODROME
SCHITT’S CREEK S6 5-7
3/18
IN A LONELY PLACE
3/19
TWIN PEAKS S1 6-7
3/20
“The Promised Hostel,” by Mary South (The Baffler)
TWIN PEAKS S1 8 (finale) S2 1
3/21
Fleishman is in Trouble, by Taffy Brodesser-Akner
THE ANDERSON TAPES
3/22
CREATURE FROM THE BLACK LAGOON
3/23
Broken, by Don Winslow
BETTER CALL SAUL S5 5
BETTER THINGS S4 5
3/24
VAGABOND
SCHITT’S CREEK S6 8-11
3/25
Ronald Rabbit is a Dirty Old Man, by Lawrence Block
3/26
HISTORY OF THE WORLD PART I
3/27
STUBER
3/28
THE TIGER KING 1
MANDY
3/29
THE RUNNING MAN
BETTER CALL SAUL S5 6
BETTER THINGS S4 6
THE TIGER KING 2 3
3/30
L’ATALANTE
BETTER CALL SAUL S5 7
THE TIGER KING 4 5 6
3/31
EATING RAOUL
THE TIGER KING 7
SCHITT’S CREEK S6 12
4/1
TWIN PEAKS S2 2 3
4/2
TWIN PEAKS S2 4
4/3
THE DECAMERON
PATHER PANCHALI
4/4
“Love Letter,” by George Saunders (The New Yorker)
“Bullet in the Brain,” by Tobias Wolff
BETTER THINGS S4 7
4/5
Cutting Edge: New Stories of Mystery and Crime by Women Writers, edited by Joyce Carol Oates
LOCAL HERO
4/6
GAS, FOOD, LODGING
4/7
THE LONG DAY CLOSES
QUEEN & SLIM
“The Everest Society,” by Shannon Sanders (OneStory)
4/8
SOLARIS (1972)
4/9
TEX AVERY’S SCREWBALL CLASSICS VOL.1
SCHITT’S CREEK S6 13-14
You Will Never Be Forgotten, by Mary South
4/10
The Burglar in Short Order, by Lawrence Block
Things from the Flood, by Simon Stålenhag
The Recently Deflowered Girl: The Right Thing to Say on Every Dubious Occasion, by Edward Gorey
4/11
UNCUT GEMS
Prisoner 489, by Joe R. Lansdale
4/12
THE LITTLE PRINCE (2015)
The Banks, by Roxane Gay, Ming Doyle.
4/13
TEKKONKINKREET
BETTER CALL SAUL S5 8
BETTER THINGS S4 8
4/15
TOM & JERRY SPOTLIGHT COLLECTION VOL.3
THE COOK, THE THIEF, HIS WIFE, AND HER LOVER
“Snakes in the Lobby,” by Amie Barrodale (Ploughshares)
4/16
FROM HELL IT CAME
NIGHTFALL
4/17
“I Happy Am,” by Jamel Brinkley (Ploughshares)
4/18
“How to Make a Monster,” by Nyssa Chow (Ploughshares)
THE SERPENT AND THE RAINBOW
4/19
SCARY STORIES TO TELL IN THE DARK
CATS
4/20
BETTER CALL SAUL S5 9
BETTER THINGS S4 9
4/21
The Grand Dark, by Richard Kadrey
BETTER CALL SAUL S5 10
4/23
PALE FLOWER
Patience, by Daniel Clowes
BETTER THINGS S4 10
4/24
“The Smart House of Mrs. O,” by Lincoln Michel (Granta)
HARVEY
4/26
9 TO 5
SALESMAN
4/28
MOTHERLESS BROOKLYN
4/29
RAISING ARIZONA
4/30
HAROLD AND MAUDE
PARKS AND RECREATION QUARANTINE SPECIAL
5/1
BETTER THINGS S4 11
FLESH GORDON
CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE THIRD KIND

5/2
STAR WARS: THE RISE OF SKYWALKER
5/3
Shuggie Bain, by Douglas Stuart
PHASE IV
5/4
MY LIFE AS A DOG
5/8
THE MUPPET MOVIE
The Darkling Halls of Ivy, edited by Lawrence Block
5/10
PASSION FISH
5/12
Dead Girl Blues, by Lawrence Block
BLOOD QUANTUM
5/13
THE STATION AGENT
5/15
LITTLE FUGITIVE
5/16
Have a Good Trip: Adventures in Psychedelics
5/17
RUBBER
5/18
The Giant’s House, by Elizabeth McCracken
5/22
DOWN IN THE DELTA
5/23
HISTORY IS MADE AT NIGHT
THE LOVEBIRDS
5/25
French Exit, by Patrick Dewitt
5/27
DOWN BY LAW
5/28
A HIDDEN LIFE
FLEABAG S1 1-6
5/29
FLEABAG S2 1-6
5/30
Blacktop Wasteland, by S. A. Cosby
6/1
THE PEANUT BUTTER FALCON

SopranosCon!

(If you are looking for regular updates, you’ll want to subscribe to my newsletter, Goombah Gumbo)

I went to the first SopranosCon! Fittingly held in The Meadowlands, where so many mob victims fertilize the polluted muck, it exceeded all expectations. I met Dominic Chianese (Uncle Junior), Vincent Pastore (Big Pussy), Burt Young (Paulie from Rocky, and also Bobby Baccala’s father), Kathrinne Narducci (Charmaine Bucco, and Mrs Bufalino in The Irishman), and so many smaller players. Over 50 actors were there, including Drea De Matteo (Adriana) who I only saw on stage, and Tony Sirico, who was too ill to make it on Sunday. Paulie Walnuts, get well soon! Here are some photos from the event. As you can see, they made it look like an Italian festival, with the banners. And of course, they had fresh zeppole for sale.

SopranosCon banner
just like it’s the Feast of San Gennaro….

I also met critics Matthew Zoller Seitz and Alan Sepinwall, who co-wrote The Sopranos Sessions, the invaluable episode by episode dissection of the show. We talked for a while about the show, crime stories, and how great it was to see everyone together again.

Me and Alan Sepinwall and Matt Zoller Seitz
Three Writing Goons

Everyone there was happy! Who would have thought that a show about a killer seeing a psychiatrist would have such a positive vibe? Dominic Chianese sang Italian songs on stage, Tony Darrow did stand-up comedy, Bada Bing dancer Diana Lynn was in a family-friendly costume… The organizers did a great job. It looked professional (and was). Great local food in the food court, with a replica of the Holsten’s booth and a Tony impersonator if you wanted an onion ring. The entry looked like a Turnpike tollbooth:

SopranosCon TollBooth

They made a maze to look like the Pine Barrens, full of quotes and photos of Christopher and Paulie as they searched for the Russian, in the most famous episode. There was even a van, with an empty Nathan’s hotdogs bag, and some packets of relish and ketchup, scattered in the fake snow! It was brilliant.

SopranosCon Maze
“he’s a fuckin’ interior decorator” … “really? his place looked like shit!”
SopranosCon Van
“mix the ketchup with the relish, it’s better!”
me and Burt Young
“I put one kid through college, I put the other through a wall”
me and Vincent Pastore
Big Pussy and Bigger Pussy
me and Dominic Chianese
Uncle Junior
The SopranosCon gang on stage
Sofia Milos speaks, Johnny Sack and others….

They are organizing a “MobMovieCon” in Atlantic City next year, if you are interested. I might go, depending on the guests. It’s refreshing, now that ComiCons have gotten overly huge, that smaller, focused cons like this can flourish. I was just talking with a friend who lamented that Chiller Theater, a New Jersey institution, seems empty now that the cosplayers and stars go to New York ComiCon instead.

This was a great time. I hope they throw another one soon!

Noir at the Bar NYC 7/14 and NEcon

Noir at the Bar (4)This July I’ll be reading at Noir at the Bar Manhattan with a gaggle of great writers. I’ll be reading a new excerpt from RiffRaff, the next Jay Desmarteaux novel. It’s at Shade, a cozy neighborhood bar right off Washington Square, where Anderson Cooper goes for savory crepes, and ThugLit Daddy Todd Robinson is often behind the stick. Come join us, it is always a fun time, and look at the roster!
July 14th 2019 6-9 PM. Shade Bar, 241 Sullivan Street, NYC. Hosted by Scott Adlerberg and Jen Conley. Readers: Ava Black, Hilary Davidson, Rob Hart, Adrian McKinty, Angie Kim, Alex Segura, Thomas Pluck, and John Vercher.

Jen Conley, author of the great YA novel Seven Ways to Get Rid of Harry–which I called This Boy’s Life filtered through a Springsteen soundtrack–will be there, but not reading for some reason! We’ll see about that. It’s a great book for all people of all ages, but especially young teen boys, who don’t have a lot of fiction that addresses family problems and role models, according to schoolteacher Conley. I loved the book.

As for myself, I’ll be reading “Red Sauce,” an excerpt from RiffRaff that was published in Vautrin magazine, if you can’t make the reading. I will also be attending Camp NEcon, the Northeastern Writer’s Conference, from July 18th to 21st. They take walk-ins, if you want to drop in. After that, I’ll be reading at Noir at the Bar Hoboken on August 4th, details forthcoming.

Left Coast Crime and Noir at the Bar Vancouver

I’ll be attending my first Left Coast Crime convention this year in Vancouver!

I will be on the Bringing Heart to Dark Stories panel moderated by Josh Stallings, with Robin Templeton, Barbara Petty, and Timothy Hallinan, on Saturday morning at 9:00AM. I will also be reading at Noir at the Bar Vancouver Thursday night, with a great roster of writers:
N@B LCC POSTER art

Meet the Beat Girls… release day for Murder-a-Go-Go’s!

I’ve been a huge fan of the Go-Go’s since I first saw the video for “Our Lips Are Sealed” on MTV as a twelve year old boy, and I still sing along with their hits in the car, and if enough beer has been applied, at karaoke. So I’m thrilled that I got to write a story inspired by “We Got the Beat.”

Wanna meet the Beat Girls? Grab a copy here: Murder-a-Go-Go’s

The lineup includes Hilary Davidson, Lori Rader Day, Susanna Calkins, Lisa Brackmann, Nadine Nettmann, Eric Beetner, Patricia Abbott, editor Holly West herself, and an introduction from Go-Go Jane Wiedlin!
I love the ’80s neo-noir look of the cover, too:

murder-go-gos_post

The blurbs are totally awesome:

“I always suspected that twinkle in the Go-Gos’ eyes was a coded invitation to a darker world. In the hands of these 25 stellar crime fiction writers, “We Got the Beat” and “Our Lips Are Sealed” become evil little gems. A totally rad read.” —Alan Hunter, Original MTV VJ, SiriusXM Host

“Shock and Awe, that sums up my reaction to MURDER-A-GO-GO’S. Shock to live in times when “The Whole World Lost Its Head” and awe at the response of these gifted writers. Buckle up for a ride that will leave “Skidmarks on Your Heart.” —Sara Paretsky, best-selling author of the V.I. Warshawski crime series

“Who knew those happy songs by one of my all-time favorite bands, the Go-Go’s, could inspire such dark, noir, spine tingling stories?!! It’s a collection of tales of distinctly female rage—the murderous kind and other wise—to keep you up at night!”—Alison Arngrim, TV’s Nellie Oleson and NY Times bestselling author, CONFESSIONS OF A PRAIRIE BITCH

It’s available today, and I’m sure you’ll go totally head over heels for it. All proceeds go to benefit Planned Parenthood.

Order Link: Murder-A-Go-Go’s at Down and Out Books